Why is it that at this time of year (specifically Christmas), women are so stressed? I can tell you — because most of the time, the woman of the house is the one to take care of 99% of the holiday details. There’s more to Christmas than buying a few gifts, wrapping them, and placing them under the tree. Luckily, Jennifer has been (and usually is) a big help in all this. Jim did a couple of things — he got the decorations out and put up the outside lights.
Here’s a list of things that must be done for Christmas day to go off smoothly:
1. Prepare and Buy gifts. This is not as easy as it sounds, especially if you have lots of family. First you have to make a list (or get last years lis as I do). This isn’t easy either! The dynamics of relationships means that the list is never the same from year to year. Some folks drop off the list and others are added. It’s the nature of life, but at this time of year it is especially important — you don’t want to accidently leave anyone off the list. Once the list is ready, you start buying gifts. When making your purchases, you have to be sure that it’s balanced. For example, I wouldn’t want to give my mother-in-law a really expensive nice gift and give my father-in-law a pair of socks. It’s even more difficult if you have children. You have to be sure that you are spending the same amount on each child and, if the children are young, you have to be sure that they have the same amount of gifts to open. Purchasing gifts goes almost until Christmas day and you are constantly revisiting the list literally and mentally until late Christmas Eve when the stores are closed. That’s the only time you can quit reviewing the list — when there is no opportunity to do anything about it. Oh — and did I mention stocking stuffers????
2. Wrap the gifts. Another item that sounds easy, but isn’t. First you must pull all the gifts out and review them. Check with the list one more time to be sure you have everything you’ve bought and that you’ve bought for everyone. Again, with children, this isn’t easy. I make two piles of goodies and go one by one to be sure everything is exactly even. Even though my kids are now 18 and 21, I still do it! Next, you have to buy the wrapping paper, tags, bows, and tape. Then you wrap. And wrap, and wrap and wrap. If you’ve never wrapped a bunch of gifts at one time, I will tell you that it’s back-breaking. It’s almost like washing dishes. You can only do it for so long before your back starts aching and you have to take a break. For this reason, I usually have about 3 wrapping sessions.
3. Prepare for dinner. I’m not hosting or having Christmas dinner at my house this year. It makes things easier, but that doesn’t mean this item can be removed from the list. Even if you aren’t hosting or having a Christmas dinner at your house, if you are going to a friend or relative’s house, you must bring something. I have 2 dinners to attend — one at Daddy’s house with my family, and one at Gay’s house for Jim’s side of the family. This all entails a bunch of planning. For dinner at Daddy’s house, I have to work with him to plan out what needs to be done when and what needs to be purchased. Thankfully, he is doing the purchasing this year so that is one item off my list. For my side of the family. Preparing for dinner takes some time. First, there’s the three-day dressing. I work with Daddy to plan what needs to be done and when it needs to be done. The three-day dressing preparation starts tomorrow. We will cook the chicken and the cornbread. Sunday I will go over and put the dressing together. I’m taking this same dressing to Gay’s house, so that alleviates a little stress. I still have to figure out when to cook the green beans.
4. Plan. Yes, plan. I mentioned several items above that must be planned, but I also must plan the entire weekend. What needs to be done and when. When we are going where. I must plan the time we will spend at family’s houses — what time we have to be there, what time that means we have to leave the house, how long we can stay before we have to go to the next place. I have to plan what needs to be take nwhere. I have to plan Christmas Eve — what time we are attending the communion service, what time we are to go to Jim’s mother’s house. I plan what else needs to be bought — can’t forget the traditional pigs and blankets for breakfast.
5. Decorate. Something that should be easy and fun is yet another stresser. Almost no one in the house wants to help. You have the tree, the inside decorations, and the outside decorations. The tree should be easy enough, but hanging all those ornaments is trying. Why? Because no one wants to do it! It’s tedious and can be boring. Then there’s placing all the decorations around the house — the pillows, throws, all the cute santas and angels. Next it’s the outside decorations. We have several yard-art type things — reindeer, inflatable snowman, spriral trees, candy-canes and the outside lights to be hung.
6. Clean. This is, of course, a never-ending thing, but especially important (to me) at Christmas. If you don’t keep things done, the house becomes a disaster before you know it. There’s Chrstmas Eve cleaning — so the house will look nice on Christmas morning, and there’s also the after-Christmas-gift opening cleaning.
7. Put it all up. This is a tough-one. When the holidays are over, it’s time to put all the decorations up and wait until next year to do it all over. While almost no one wanted to help decorate, nobody wants to help take the decorations down. Everything must be gathered, rewrapped in packaging, reboxed, and put back into storage.
Most men do almost nothing for Christmas. They continue on in their normal lives, and as if by magic, Christmas day takes care of itself. The 25th arrives, and, lookie!!, Santa visited during the night! There really is a Santa Claus!
In addition to everything above, most women do these things (Prepare/Buy gifts, Wrap gifts, Prepare, Plan, Decorate, Clean. Put it all up) while doing what they normally have to do. Work, housework, grocery shopping, etc.! Does this sound easy? It’s not. A lot of it can be fun, but taken all together, it’s overwhelming. Why do we do it? We do it because we love our families and want them to have a great Christmas. Do they appreciate it? That’s the age-old question.
